i love Mexico. I LOVE MEXICO. i love mexico. I lOvE mExIcO. i <3 mexico. I LovE MexicO. ((:
Plain and simple, i love it here.
i love the people, i love the fellowship, i love my roomies, i love this base, i love the town, i love the shopping. i love everything about this place. for real.
Honestly, i didn't think i would come to love this place so much it's weird. It's definitely ten times better than what i expected, but hey God loves to exceed our expectations doesn't he? There's so many beautiful people here with their ideas and their personalities. I feel rather blessed to be a part of something so amazing. I can totally feel God working. I mean who else could take me out of the spiritual slump i've been in and put the joy back into my heart? It's great, i mean seriously.
I know things are going to get harder when the speakers start speaking but i'm okay with that. I want God to break me and change me into the person he wants me to be. I'm ready for it.
well, sleep is in order so goodnight (:
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Crazy.
i leave tomorrow for YWAM Ensenada, Mexico.
Crazy right? I feel like it was just yesterday that i was wishing it was time to leave and now i'm trying to love every second i have left at home. I'm still not done packing, almost, but not quite.
When i'm gone i will be trying to update this as much as possible and my posts will be of more important things than my worries!
I need prayer, a lot of it. In order for this trip to benefit me or anyone then I need to be open to what God has to teach me. I need to be soley focused on Him and his desires and plans for me. I can't do this without Him. He needs to be my hope and joy and security going into this trip.
But oh how i'll miss everyone here. Know that I love you and I always will. (:
Keep me in your prayers.
Crazy right? I feel like it was just yesterday that i was wishing it was time to leave and now i'm trying to love every second i have left at home. I'm still not done packing, almost, but not quite.
When i'm gone i will be trying to update this as much as possible and my posts will be of more important things than my worries!
I need prayer, a lot of it. In order for this trip to benefit me or anyone then I need to be open to what God has to teach me. I need to be soley focused on Him and his desires and plans for me. I can't do this without Him. He needs to be my hope and joy and security going into this trip.
But oh how i'll miss everyone here. Know that I love you and I always will. (:
Keep me in your prayers.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
hold up.
wait a minute put a little love in it! hehe, that has nothing to do with my post whatsoever but it's what popped into my head when i wrote that blog title. :D my mind works a little funny!
YWAM is eleven days away. 11. once. elf. onze.
that's so craaaaaaaaazy. it feels like just yesterday i was applying to it. & oh dear i haven't even started the book yet.
my feelings have changed about YWAM a little bit. I'm more excited than i was, maybe because some things here just aren't working out. ): Maybe because i actually do want to get out and help people even if it means i have to struggle. I am probably the most selfish person you've ever met. Seriously. Most of the time I only think about myself and whether doing something will benefit me. That's the wrong attitude to have. I want to be able to say at the end of my life that i put others first in every situation i possibly could. Because isn't that what we should be striving for? To be like Jesus and serve others. Isn't that why i decided to do YWAM? It doesn't mean i'm gonna stop doing some of the things i'm doing now because frankly i just don't want to!
IDK, my life is one crazy, confusing, messed up jumble right now. :D but that's okay with me. i'm learning a lot, especially about who i want to be and what i want to do.
danng. i just love people. a lot. like i FREAKING love people, you really have no idea. I want to help people whether they're here in PA or in Mexico. i've been sucking at that latley. so i'm sorry i've let you down..
just please please please don't expect me to be perfect.. i'm trying i really am. it's hard ya know?!
comments would be niceee! (:
YWAM is eleven days away. 11. once. elf. onze.
that's so craaaaaaaaazy. it feels like just yesterday i was applying to it. & oh dear i haven't even started the book yet.
my feelings have changed about YWAM a little bit. I'm more excited than i was, maybe because some things here just aren't working out. ): Maybe because i actually do want to get out and help people even if it means i have to struggle. I am probably the most selfish person you've ever met. Seriously. Most of the time I only think about myself and whether doing something will benefit me. That's the wrong attitude to have. I want to be able to say at the end of my life that i put others first in every situation i possibly could. Because isn't that what we should be striving for? To be like Jesus and serve others. Isn't that why i decided to do YWAM? It doesn't mean i'm gonna stop doing some of the things i'm doing now because frankly i just don't want to!
IDK, my life is one crazy, confusing, messed up jumble right now. :D but that's okay with me. i'm learning a lot, especially about who i want to be and what i want to do.
danng. i just love people. a lot. like i FREAKING love people, you really have no idea. I want to help people whether they're here in PA or in Mexico. i've been sucking at that latley. so i'm sorry i've let you down..
just please please please don't expect me to be perfect.. i'm trying i really am. it's hard ya know?!
comments would be niceee! (:
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Sunday, September 5, 2010
good grief.
i leave in exactly 20 days for Ensenada, Mexico.
you may wonder if i'm ready to go and the answer is...... i'm not.
not in the least bit. negative. not at all.
Actually, the very thought of leaving terrifies me to the core. Yea, God has big things in store, i've heard that a lot now but it doesn't make leaving any less hard. Here are some things holding me back-
work-i finally love going to work, it's not such a pain anymore. the people there are awesome and i love working with them.
friends-my best friends in the entire world are here. i know i'll make new friends that much is obvious but the people i care about most are here. the people i want to care about are here. ch.gh.kk. <3
brother[s]-my little brother daniel is the single most greatest human being in my life. leaving him is going to be the hardest thing i've ever done. And my other "brother" tyler. he's awesome. i think you should meet him. not having him to text whenever i need to is gonna be hard, hands down.
family-it's just going to be weird not seeing them everyday.
It's not like i'm going to back out. i just have my doubts in going. annnnnnd there could be a few other things that are holding me back, but i will NOT be posting them on here. they're a little too personal. it's just hard since it's so close. i remember when the only thing i wanted was to leave to be out of here. oh my how the tables have turned. now i'm practically begging for a few more days at home.
i've already talked to some of the people i'm going with which is cool. but there's 26 people who are doing the DTS. TWENTYSIX. holy crap. that's waaay too many. that alone worries me. i know i'm just a worrier. but that alone is enough to stress me out. there's no way i'm sharing my whole life story with 26 other people. i'm open and honest with almost anyone but in this type of setting no way. i'm just a little freaked out
So, basically what i need you NOT to do is tell me that my worries are stupid because to me they are not. Don't tell me that God is going to work in my life in so many ways- i already know this i don't want to hear it again.
Well, that's all for now. .
you may wonder if i'm ready to go and the answer is...... i'm not.
not in the least bit. negative. not at all.
Actually, the very thought of leaving terrifies me to the core. Yea, God has big things in store, i've heard that a lot now but it doesn't make leaving any less hard. Here are some things holding me back-
work-i finally love going to work, it's not such a pain anymore. the people there are awesome and i love working with them.
friends-my best friends in the entire world are here. i know i'll make new friends that much is obvious but the people i care about most are here. the people i want to care about are here. ch.gh.kk. <3
brother[s]-my little brother daniel is the single most greatest human being in my life. leaving him is going to be the hardest thing i've ever done. And my other "brother" tyler. he's awesome. i think you should meet him. not having him to text whenever i need to is gonna be hard, hands down.
family-it's just going to be weird not seeing them everyday.
It's not like i'm going to back out. i just have my doubts in going. annnnnnd there could be a few other things that are holding me back, but i will NOT be posting them on here. they're a little too personal. it's just hard since it's so close. i remember when the only thing i wanted was to leave to be out of here. oh my how the tables have turned. now i'm practically begging for a few more days at home.
i've already talked to some of the people i'm going with which is cool. but there's 26 people who are doing the DTS. TWENTYSIX. holy crap. that's waaay too many. that alone worries me. i know i'm just a worrier. but that alone is enough to stress me out. there's no way i'm sharing my whole life story with 26 other people. i'm open and honest with almost anyone but in this type of setting no way. i'm just a little freaked out
So, basically what i need you NOT to do is tell me that my worries are stupid because to me they are not. Don't tell me that God is going to work in my life in so many ways- i already know this i don't want to hear it again.
Well, that's all for now. .
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